Dear South Africa

Dear South Africa,

it will be two years in July since i last was on your soil.

just crazy.
its unreal.
sometimes i think i am still going through culture shock and other times i think i never really left Canada.

for starters, i still can't shop in a mall. its so overwhelming i get anxiety and look for the nearest exit. the way people consume and spend when so many don't have any - its something i haven't been able to deal with yet. i re read my journals and look at videos and pictures and i sometimes trick myself into thinking that i can drive over and see hold my kids. oh how i wish i could hear them laugh one more time.
then, i think about how i went right back into university and got engaged. life has been happening so fast that often it feels like you were just a dream.
overall, i just miss you. i miss your gorgeous mountains and the warm Indian ocean that tossed me around so many times. i miss the hot weather and being able to wear whatever i wanted.

more importantly though, i miss the people i lived with, worked with and went to church with. i've learnt the only things that last our peoples souls and God's word. i got to meet the most amazing people on your land that i will forever love and call family. i miss them a lot.
i miss the freedom i felt in your country even though there wasn't a lot of it. but you made me feel free. i knew i was living in the centre of God's will and that is the greatest freedom of all. i so wish you would get better at the whole freedom thing though. i wish you would have allowed me to walk by myself and not be so scared of getting attacked. i wish you would stop rapping young women and that your government wouldn't be so corrupt. i wish you believed more in education and paid teachers a fair wage to teach your next generation. we definitely had our ups and downs but when looking back i only remember the good. funny how that works. and South Africa, you were too good to me.

as a nineteen year old living in a foreign country you allowed me to learn who i was and my purpose in life. you allowed me to be challenged by seeing poverty up close and let me cry long and hard as i tried to figure out what i could do about it. you allowed me to ask deep hard questions in your country, knowing that the answers would never be there.

it was in your country when i fully accepted God's unending love.

it was in your country when i realized i would marry my husband.

it was in your country when i got to be a mom to the most stunning children i will ever met. my heart aches for their hugs each day but i am so grateful to have met them. you allowed me to love on them and i am so thankful for the opportunity.
thank you for having such an amazing impact on my life. the Lord knew what He was doing when He told me to do service work in your country for the year.

look after my kids for me and the people i love so much.

till we meet again,


ps. i wrote a letter to South Africa after living there for 8 months with a few to go. Click the link to check it out: http://foreverhisbymadeline.blogspot.ca/2012/04/letter-to-south-africa.html


Doing Something New

our beautiful new plants in our window seal! so much fun.
since graduating in December i landed my first contracted job working from home doing administration work. it's been a great job and i am so grateful to be working from home.. but every job has its pros and cons. i'm very extraverted and spending all day at home sometimes drives me crazy. i crave people and daily interaction. i loved the business of university life and this season i'm living in now is slow. my jobs come when they come and often i'm left alone with my thoughts - & trust me that's always a scary place to be… just ask my husband!
i wasn't sure to label this emotion lonely but i think that's what i'm dealing with. since i've been struggling to keep busy and my type A personality thrives off of work i've been very discouraged. now that the weather is nicer i am hoping the loneliness goes away. i've been taking walks and trying to get outside- and even got the market yesterday! hurray!
we'll go anywhere for you Lord. Dreaming big
i've accepted that this is the season i'm in and i know God is teaching me so much through these lonely days. but i have admit i am excited and dreaming God dreams for the fall. Mark and i will both be unemployed and we are just excited what God is going to do with our lives!
i know this isn't Isaiah but its a pic i took while going through the SixtySixin60 reading plan!
my Pastor preached from Isaiah 43 last week and we studied one of my favourite verses. "Do not call to mind the former things or ponder things of the past. Behold I will do something new" (Isaiah 43:18)

through this lonely week my hope is fixed on this verse. i know God is doing something new. i am excited for the new that will take place in a few months.

happy friday!! hope you have such a great weekend:)


Noah - Movie Review

i'm sure i'll edit what i'm about to type.. well maybe not.. isn't blogging all about being open and writing how you feel?

anyways i've heard a lot about the movie Noah and read a lot of reviews about it. as a christian i am so excited to support movies that have a biblical background and really wanted to see it. i attended a hillsong united concert back in November and they had showed us the trailer. Hillsong [a mega church in Australia] has close doctrine to what i would believe so i wanted to give this movie a try. i am embarrassed to type this out now but i've been so excited since November waiting to see this film.

within the first five minutes of the movie i wanted to walk out. it was that bad. the movie Noah has nothing to do with the bible story of Noah at all. what is even worse is this movie slanders God multiple times. one leaves the theatre believing God wants to kill newborn babies and has no hope rather than showing God's ultimate plan and authority in bringing a world back to Him.

the biblical characters weren't even correct.  all one would have to do is pick up a bible and you would find the characters to use. Yes, Noah had three sons but they had wives and children that went on the ark. So much time was spent on the sons not having anyone to marry and how God was going to wipe out humanity including Noah's line so there was just creation and innocent animals. Mark (my husband) was beyond furious too. We kept looking at each other throughout the painful two hours and twenty minutes in disbelief. How could this be so far from the truth? it was almost laughable that we were watching something so untrue.

how could someone mess it up so bad? Halfway through I told Mark to just look at it as a Hollywood movie with no resemblance at all to it ever being a bible story… but even then.. the plot line was terrible and we couldn't get over the fact how twisted a plot line this could be.

sure it seems like i'm hating here.. and i admit i am.. but i haven't even mentioned that there was transformer like figures that helped Noah build the ark and originally came to earth to help Adam and Eve. i'm sorry. but God has never and will never need our help… especially not from transformer like creatures who in the end were "taken back to the creator in a light show up into the sky." really? URG!

i am embarrassed to have watched this movie and wasted one of my only evenings off, however i am thankful that i am able to form my own opinion on the film. i really believe that before one can talk (or in my case rant) about a film, project, book etc they need to read/experience it.

in conclusion this is what went wrong: they mixed in evolution and creation, had transformers who built the ark, didn't have the characters correct, never mentioned God once, fate was up to man, Noah proclaimed that "the creator" wanted to destroy humans too and was going to kill the first born. Another man that wasn't apart of Noah's family (the king from the line of Cain) got into the ark and lived with the animals, the grandfather had weird supernatural powers that were so wrong, they adopted an orphan girl, there was a war to get onto the ark and Noah said he wasn't coming onto the ark but was going to die outside, and above all this movie didn't glorify God once but did the opposite - slandered His perfect and Holy name.

i encourage you to read the real story of Noah found in Genesis 5-10. and if you've seen the movie i actually beg you to read Genesis. please.

i am embarrassed that this movie has any connection to the bible. i so wish they didn't call it Noah or try to create this in Hollywood.

my heart hurts for people who don't know Jesus to have watched that movie. what an awful thing to think that this story is in the bible. i wish i could sit down and talk to every person who watched this movie and tell them the real thing - show them proof rather than a slanderous and just awful plot line.

i have to remind myself in such a corrupt world that there is truth and that truth is only found in God's word.

have you seen the movie? what are your thoughts about this film?

ps. i didn't edit. just pressing publish now!



so i've decided to finally do this….and i've decided to post it on social media to hold me accountable…so i hope.

i've never read through the entire bible but boy do i have a desire too. the more i learn about the character of God the more desperate i am to read my bible. i literally feel like i know nothing sometimes and am so unqualified. i love spending time in God's holy word to get me equipped for the day.

so i've decided to follow a daily bible reading plan to keep on me on track to read the bible cover to cover… its called SixtySixin60. Yes, you're right, i am attempting to read the bible in sixty days. 

its a lot of reading but something that i want to do and i'm so excited to say i've started and its been going great! i'm on day 4 and already halfway through Exodus.

if you see me/have my cell number please check in with me to see how i'm doing. i would love the encouragement.

& if this is something you've been thinking about doing, or want to see what the bible has to say even though you don't believe in it- this is a great chance. would love to have you do this with me.

ps. it takes me just under 2 hours to read each day and i'm a super slow reader
here is the 60 day plan

you can follow SixtySixin60 on instagram, twitter and this blog http://sixtysixin60.wordpress.com - the blog has the sixty day reading plan, 120 and one year plans. check them out for sure. 

hope you're having a great weekend!!


fresh start. fresh blog. hey SPRING

honestly how much did you love Monday and Tuesdays weather?? i hate cleaning and was actually in the mood to wash our cupboards and floors with the windows wide open. our apartment finally got some fresh air in it (although i had to wear a sweater and vest to keep warm after a while)

i'm so stoked for capris, wedges and rain coats but spring reminds me of all things new and fresh. i'm a person who loves change and there is something about spring that makes me long for change and a fresh start or perspective.
i absolutely love this blog and love where foreverhis has taken me. i started this blog because i love to journal and wanted a record of my thoughts online. i didn't even know about readers. in less than a month i found out i was headed to South Africa so it only made sense to continue blogging to update family and friends. i struggled blogging when i came home because i felt i didn't have anything to say… i had readers from Africa but now i was boring old student with nothing exciting happening in my life. this past year i've realize that i love blogging whether people read it or not because i love to write. my hope is to have a record of my thoughts and to encourage you in your day. blogging is my hobby and i really love it. 

although i don't blog all the time i love foreverhis and hope you have enjoyed your time here as well. so since its spring and i love change i decided to give foreverhis a makeover! however, this change has been a long time coming. i've been researching blog templates since November. i didn't think i should spend the money on a template since my blog doesn't create a revenue. after much convincing my supportive husband told me just to do it - and since its starting to feel like spring a new change is just what foreverhis needed (and me).

i'm so excited to show you my simple whitespace template that i purchased from envye. i just love the simplicity of it all and hope you do too.

you can check out her work here. http://envye.com  this was my runner up template. so cute too!

really hope you are enjoying the first signs of spring and this new template. i am so excited to keep blogging and so blessed that you're a reader!!

ps. if you do love this blog feel free to share it around with your friends...just saying:)


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envye template.