Dear Marlowe // Three Months

My Miss Marlowe,

This month has been so so good - much better for me than the first two. Nothing you have done or did but just your crazy Momma trying to figure out motherhood with two kiddos! First off, you are amazing. You have such a good temperament and go with the flow. Jackson demands and needs a lot of my attention during the day and for the first two months I felt so guilty about all of this but seeing your personality develop - you are quite happy to be sitting in your chair, watching Jackson and taking it all in. It doesn’t bother you if you I don’t hold you 24/7 - you actually prefer that I don’t. The whole nature/nurture debate amazes me as I process and learn more about you but as I get to see your personality more, we are coming into a good place and I know this will only get better and sweeter as we figure out some things.

The things I need to write down so I don’t forget:

At 12 weeks you weighed 12 pounds 15 oz

You will not take the bottle at all. I waited until 8 weeks to start trying because I didn’t want to deal with nipple confusion however I think I ruined you and if I could do it all over again I would introduce a bottle from day one. This has been the biggest stress on me and your Dad. I have committed to things that I am unable to take you with me for and you still won’t take the bottle. You also refuse a soother. Any time the bottle/soother anything other than me is placed before you, you start screaming. And it’s a mad cry. A cry, completely specific to when we ask you to take a bottle. Different people have tried, I’ve been out of the house, we’ve literally done ALL the tricks. Every morning I’m pumping and trying to give you a bottle and we spend a good hour each day crying. It is so exhauasting - you are exhausted and mad at me and I am almost in tears. Also, your brother has loved this because he normally gets the iPad every morning because I need to focus! My first wedding is August 11 and we are just praying and begging and trying to figure out how to do life if you don’t take a bottle and I am not around for the day!

Along the lines of food, you are a quick feeder. I am now feeding both sides and a full feed takes about 10 minutes including burbing you - you are a champ and that has been so amazing because I can get a lot done (and also Jackson doesn’t like when I feed so that is helpful)

Sleep  - you are doing really good in this area! Again, opposite of your brother! You will sleep for good chunks of time if I hold you and are doing 6 hour chunks in the evening. There even has been times where I will put you down around 10pm and you will sleep till 4 which is awesome. Then after food you head right back to sleep around 7-8am. There is no big sleep patterns for you yet but I know until four months your brain hasn’t developed those so I am pretty relaxed about your sleep. You still sleep in the lamb but we will be moving you to your own room and into the crib very shortly. We just have one trip back to Elmira first and then we will make the move. I always feel like the newborn haze slowly lifts when you move out of my room and into yours. Schedules and better rhythms can be made. Really looking forward to this into month three!!

The bond between you and your brother is growing and it is making my Momma heart so beyond happy. Jackson started calling you “Mar Mar” and loves to get you and play with you. He goes up to your lamb and says “Mar Mar hiiiiiiiiiii” in his high pitched voice and you give him the biggest smile. It is so precious and I want to capture these moments forever, but I know I will forget them too soon. You smile and coo and don’t spit up as much. You love sitting in the green chair and you try to sit up ALL the time. It honestly looks like you are doing sit ups all day every day in your chair. You follow me around when I’m making dinner and you can see across the room now when we come in.

You are forced to do a lot because Jackson wants you to be apart of his everyday taks (bedtime routine, praying before meals etc) and you don’t cry and obliged.

I am so excited to continue to learn about you and see your personality grow. We’ve bonded so much better this month with all the news ways you interact and I feel like you and me are getting our rhythms down. I know your cries and when you need sleep (every 2 hours or less- and when you first wake up in the morning you can’t stay awake for more than an hour). All of this learning has made me a better Momma and been able to keep you happier. Your witching hours have ended in the evening and all is going good.

I thank Jesus for you baby girl. All throughout the day. I know you are His and His love for you is more than I could every imagine. I know He adores you and will take care of you. I pray and beg the Lord that you would know His love and experience it at such a young age. I really believe there is no “Jr Holy Spirit” and even though you are little I think about it all the time. God has great plans for you and He uses children for His plans and Kingdom. I can’t wait to see you learn about Him and understand His deep affection for you.

We love you Miss Marlowe! Happy 3 Months my sweetheart


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